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I've Been Officially Uninvited to the Potty Party

Posted on Monday, January 25, 2010 — Listed under Daily Grind
Jan 25

Why is it that when toddlers are almost (but not quite) ready to potty train, they become strictly confidential about their business and feel they must steal away to a secret hideout while they drop The Big One? I know it's not just my children, because even other kids I babysit do the exact same thing. One minute they are happily rolling trucks up and down my stereo speakers or sticking Lego in their bellybuttons … the next they are off in a secluded corner squatting, grunting, and giving you dirty looks when you come by to check on them.

You'd think this would suggest they are ready to potty train, since they are clearly aware of what's happening, and what's more—capable of planning covert potty operations. If Diego is able to mosey on over to his private toilet beneath the kitchen table to do his business, he should be equally able to head on over to the john and do the same, right?

Seems like a fairly simple equation, but at least in the case of my children, this math doesn't quite add up. If I try to encourage Diego to go to the toilet when I see him sneaking off, he just gets mad and yells at me to “Stop it!” and “Go away!” If I force the issue, a full-scale tantrum with screaming, kicking, and foaming at the mouth is imminent.

On the other hand, for some reason, my five-year-old son Nino recently decided to try potty-training Diego and this endeavor is going over splendidly. Whenever Nino suggests a brotherly potty rendezvous, Diego claps his hands and jumps up and down with glee. He runs toward the bathroom, stripping off his diaper as he races down the hall, so excited he is to sit upon his tiny blue throne with his big brother's supervision.

From the other side of the door I can hear them talking. “Okay, Diego,” Nino instructs. “Do you have to go potty?”

“Uh-huh,” says Diego.

“Okay, sit down right here. Yes. That's right … good job! You peed! I'm so proud of you!”

“Pee!” Diego says cheerfully as Nino claps for him.

I rush in, eager to join the potty party. But the minute I pop my face inside, Diego shouts, “No! Stop it. No! Out!” while he tries to slam the door upon my face. Apparently, this is one party to which I have not been invited.

On the other hand, I am the only one currently permitted the privilege of changing Diego's diaper when he's made an enormous stinky poop. After he's done hiding beneath the table in his personal toilet, he rushes over to me with his smiling announcement. “Mami! Poopy!” he declares, as if the smell wasn't enough to alert me. When any other capable adult in our household offers to change him, Diego shrieks, “Noooooo!” and runs to hide beneath my legs.

But you know what? As twisted as it may be, I take a little pride in that. I may be banned from potty parties, but I'm top of the list for diaper duty. I'm a mother and, well, I take what I can get.
 




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15 comments | Add your own »

I love that! I have a five year old and a two year old. I may tell them this story and see if they will take the whole stinky business off my hands, too.

Comments by Mwa
Tuesday, January 26, 2010 at 2:51:04 PM

My oldest used to do it. I swear, I thought he would bust a vein in his head. The bummer of all this? Totally not reciprocal. Where's my privacy? The boys think that when I'm on the toilet, it's a cocktail party.

Comments by Nancy C
Tuesday, January 26, 2010 at 12:49:25 PM

These are wonderful moments. Loved your 'coverage'!!!

Comments by june
Tuesday, January 26, 2010 at 6:00:40 AM

i won't deny that it's abssolutely adorable that nino helps deigo in the bathroom... but i must admit i doubt i'll ever get to the point where i appreciate changing all the poopy diapers. i wouldn't even mind if i got kicked out of the bathroom and only daddy were allowed to change diapers :) maybe when i'm on my last child ill feel differently, but i doubt it :)

Comments by elise
Monday, January 25, 2010 at 7:22:32 PM

This story cracked me up! I guess it's their way of getting some independence from their mommies. Sad for us, though! Although it's nice to be able to still hang on to the diaper!

Comments by Sarah C.
Monday, January 25, 2010 at 7:19:02 PM

I always heard that toddlers go to a hiding place to poop. I even saw many do it, but not mine. Devyn would be running across the room, pause for less than a second (sort of), grunt and keep running, not really breaking his stride. That's how we knew he pooped. Catching and changing him were amazing scenes for about 6 months until he decided diaper changes were worth slowing down for. I love the big brother teacher! Matthew learns many things quickly from Devyn, like they have an art class some days (initiated by Devyn). Matthew's drawing ability increased amazingly in one hour. Sometimes I have to curb it when Devyn tries to teach him spelling exceptions. Now Matthew says patiently, "Devyn, I don't know how to read yet." Parenthood is a so worth it challenging adventure :)

Comments by heidi
Monday, January 25, 2010 at 1:04:03 PM

Enjoyed reading and you know how much i can relate to most of what you are going through since Jenna is same age as Diego:) She also loves to hide in my closet when it's poop time ,then she would say "Mommy i wanna go potty!" i take her just to encourage her that next time she has to say before the fact has taken place:) once she sits on the toilet she shouts "Go Out!Shut the Door! "i guess it's good that she feels it's a private matter!

Comments by Maha
Monday, January 25, 2010 at 12:42:33 PM

Does Diego want to come and live here? Car knows when she's going and now will come to you and say happy when she has just peed but will not sit on the potty without clothes on!! She will scream and tantrum if we bring the potty out into her view! AAGH! But then the other night when we wanted her to go to bed she sat on the potty and said pee pee mummy -clothed mind in pj's and everything!

Comments by Barenakedmummy
Monday, January 25, 2010 at 11:56:34 AM

Love that story!! Following you back!!

Comments by Lee The hot Flash Queen
Monday, January 25, 2010 at 11:45:14 AM

What a cute story. Nino is such a great big bro!

Comments by Hillary
Monday, January 25, 2010 at 11:02:49 AM

that's great. I just had to give up on Poppy as she began screaming hysterically and kicking me everytime i put her in the vicinity of the toilet and potty. I took the hint. But won't miss those stinky nappies - like you, I'm her personal Nappy Changer and no-one else need apply for the job!

Comments by Mummy Mania
Monday, January 25, 2010 at 10:50:16 AM

Potty-training is a particularly exasperating aspect of parenting. It has been a long, long road at the EW house. Did I mention that the road has been LONG? Ugh.

Comments by existentialwaitress
Monday, January 25, 2010 at 10:32:57 AM

LOL! When Nola started peeing on the floor after taking a bath I bought her a potty to pee in. She thought it was cool twice but then decided peeing on the floor was more fun. I think I am going to get a big fail in the potty training dept.

Comments by amy
Monday, January 25, 2010 at 9:24:50 AM

What a great big brother! Now see if he will make dinner and clean the house too!

Comments by Dalia (Generation X Mom)
Monday, January 25, 2010 at 9:16:13 AM

Lol, well, at least he has a big brother wiling to help him out. It makes your job so much easier, even if you are the only one on diaper duty. I know I'm not looking forward to potty training for poopy; I've got her pee trained sorta, but I can never catch her pooing sinc she makes very silent sounds and then the stink wafts through the house. Ah the pleasures of being a mommy. Lol. Have a great day. Http://halemom.com

Comments by Erica
Monday, January 25, 2010 at 8:08:05 AM


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